My broken heart, for her happy one.

What can I say? I was always in danger of liking her again if I went back. And I did. I thought by now she would have a boyfriend, and she does. So my plan did work out after all, the plan of not telling her anything at all about me liking her while I was still living in Malaysia. It worked to perfection. I made it look like I liked someone else while I was living in Malaysia (I'm sorry you-should-know-I'm-talking-about-you) and it worked. (I'm really sorry [if you read my blog you know I'm talking about you])

The girl I liked in reality had no clue, or so I think, and she could just live her life the way she was at the time, and in the future, get a boyfriend, which she has, without any regrets or anything like it. Even though I left Malaysia, I still had that feeling for her, but I held it in. I held it in, for so long, even getting close to vanishing it completely but failing, until the first trip (just came back from it) I made to Malaysia since migrating to Australia.

The bubble that was protecting the secret from getting out was popped by me. I just had to tell her. It was getting close to driving me nuts. Also, since she asked, so well, I basically told her. I had worked so so very hard, to not let her know, and I ruined it. You know sometimes the decisions I make, man, they can be really Really REALLY stupid sometimes.

Now, well, I'm left with a broken heart, but no worries. She's happy, which is good. Just not with me, with some other guy. The guy's name is J(--privacy purposes--)or PoohBear. I'm not sure whether it would be good or bad if she reads this, but if she does, I hope she stays happy with him I guess. I'm not sure what to hope anymore. If you're reading this, and you should know I'm talking about you, now do you know why I did what I did? I certainly hope you do. I did it for you.

See, now you're happy with J(--privacy purposes--) aren't you? So my plan, worked, I guess. I'm not completely sure.

APOLOGIES: I'm really sorry if I hurt you, I didn't mean to, and I didn't realise you read my blog. Maybe you just started, but if you read this post, and get hurt or offended by it, I'm sorry. It was something that I thought I had to do, but then again, maybe I didn't. I'm not completely sure of what I was thinking then, as I was only 12, when I decided on the plan. I'm really Really REALLY sorry.

I'm also very sorry to the girl (that was mentioned in the first paragraph) I well, misused in my plan, I hope you forgive me for telling you such a big lie that redefined the meaning of petsister and petbrother in your heart. I'm sorry.